


Loving Religiously

by Green_Sphynx



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, First Time, M/M, Religious angsting, Sex toys (referenced), True Love Conquers All, dirty boys, shy boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-24 13:40:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17705306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Green_Sphynx/pseuds/Green_Sphynx
Summary: "You came."Only Cullen would be able to lace two small words like that with reverence, wonder and relief all at once. Sebastian prided himself in his abilities to speak with people, but only Cullen could convey so much with so little effort."Of course," he answered, voice gentle and calm despite his inner turmoil. "Don't I always?"





	Loving Religiously

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cullenlovesmen (handersmyheart)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/handersmyheart/gifts).



Sebastian found his love praying, kneeling on the hard stone floor next to his bed like a child saying his prayers before bed. Cullen only gave him a quick glance to make sure no stranger had walked into his small but private room in the barracks, before returning to the quiet mutters of his prayer, too soft for Sebastian to make out.

Sebastian would be the very last one to interrupt anyone's prayers, even if he had come here for the most sinful of reasons. He simply knelt next to Cullen, folding his hands together to join his love in prayer. To beg the Maker and his Holy Bride for forgiveness, for what he was about to do.

He had broken his vows for love before - for the love of his family, to find vengeance for their unjust deaths brought upon them by cowards. Elthina had never quite forgiven him, and as she spoke for the Holy Andraste, it was debatable if She had ever forgiven him either. With that in mind, he couldn't pray enough, for what would come next would once again put love before his vows to the Maker and his Holy Bride, and he could never be forgiven for doing it twice.

And yet, he was going to do it anyway.

Sebastian was weak, and he knew it, but he was past the point of resisting his feelings and desires. He was past the point of no return. There was no denying that Cullen was his everything, even more so than the Chantry, no matter how ashamed he was to even admit it in the quiet of his own head.

Cullen shifted next to him, so Sebastian wrapped up his prayer with his graces to Andraste, thanking her for all the chances she had given her people - the chances he was about to cast aside - and her patience with people undeserving. When he lowered his hands to smooth his palms over his thighs and look aside, it was to find Cullen watching him.

"You came."

Only Cullen would be able to lace two small words like that with reverence, wonder and relief all at once. Sebastian prided himself in his abilities to speak with people, but only Cullen could convey so much with so little effort.

"Of course," he answered, voice gentle and calm despite his inner turmoil. "Don't I always?" No doubt the Templars on guard duty were already speculating that the brother came to the Circle at night so often for more than just delivering spiritual guidance to mages.

Cullen stood first, offering Sebastian a hand to help him up on his feet and then immediately pulling him down to sit on the bed. This was still safe territory, something they did shamefully often, so Sebastian easily shuffled closer until they were pressed thigh to thigh, arm to arm, breath to breath.

"We shouldn't be doing this," Cullen reminded him, as if that had ever stopped them before.

Well, it had always stopped them a little. It had stopped them at the line they knew they could really not cross, sticking to the grey area before it. Sebastian was ready to cross that line tonight.

"I no longer care." He cared a lot, actually, but the flesh was weak. "You are more important t'me than-" Sebastian faltered, swallowing heavily at the worried look on Cullen's face. But Cullen wasn't interrupting him, waiting patiently for him to find his words and explain what he was about. "When- when Andraste lived, all She did, She did out of luv. Her luv fer Her people and Her luv fer the Maker. It was Her Holy duty, but She dinnae do it fer that. She only acted out of luv."

Sebastian watched Cullen suck in a shuddering breath, and he tangled their fingers between them, bringing Cullen's hands up to his lips to kiss his knuckles. "I cannae act out of duty any longer, Cullen. I luv you- I want you too much to ignore it anymore. I know it's not my place but- I mean…" He took a deep breath, closing his eyes and pressing Cullen's hands against his lips harder to gather himself. "I want you. Let me follow in Andraste's footsteps rather than Her Chantry. Let me follow my luv fer you rather than my duty to Her."

Next thing he knew, Cullen was kissing him hard. He had barely noticed them moving, and yet he was pinned to the bed, just a little more luxurious than his simple cot back in the cloister of the Chantry in Hightown, Cullen heavy on top of him and his lips desperate as if trying to suck the life out of him. Sebastian whimpered, fingers carding through Cullen's curls to muss them up and out of the neatly combed style the Knight-Captain tried to keep them in all day, tugging insistently for more.

"Did you bring your-?"

Sebastian didn't leave Cullen's lips the freedom to finish his question - not like he needed to finish it when they both knew exactly what Cullen was asking for. They had gotten… creative. Making love without breaking Sebastian's vows. Having sex without touching.

They would kiss - filthy, _filthy_ kisses that were as far from virtue as a cock up Sebastian's arse could ever be, but that was all they would touch. Cullen would stroke himself to the sight of Sebastian fucking himself on a wooden plug or dildo, hands kept to themselves and lips only brushing when they weren't touching themselves at the same time.

It was a mockery of virtue but they were desperate for each other, desperate enough to find any loophole in the rules.

Not this time.

"I want _you_ ," Sebastian murmured against Cullen's lips, revelling in the hitch of his lover's breath and the increased press of his body, feeling the outline of Cullen's erection through their breeches, pressing into his thigh.

"Are you sure?"

"Never have been so sure of anything in my life," Sebastian vowed, and Cullen slanted their lips together again with a needy whimper, although Sebastian wasn't sure if the whimper had been Cullen or himself.

Everything was both more sinful and more wholesome at the same time from that point on.

Sebastian was more certain; now it was said out loud, he truly passed the point of no return. It was too late for regrets now, so he might as well enjoy what he was doing. Cullen however, didn't seem to have made the same leap yet. His lips were softer and more hesitant than usual against Sebastian's, his fingers skirting over Sebastian's clothes so lightly Sebastian could barely feel it.

He knew Cullen had made no vows of chastity. They had discussed it before and they knew Cullen was free to love as he wished. There was no sin in this for him except for leading Sebastian into one.

But Sebastian had taken the leap himself, and Cullen should have no reason to hesitate any longer.

Sebastian pulled back, their breaths heavy and mingling between them, his head pressed hard against the thin pillow for the little distance he could make between them. His eyes searched Cullen's face, but all he could see was a hesitation with Cullen trying to read him at the same time.

"You _do_ want this, right?" Sebastian asked, uncertain. "Or did I assume-"

A hard kiss to his lips silenced him, and Cullen shook his head hard. "No- you didn't- I mean…" The way Cullen bit his lip, a hand twitching against Sebastian's shoulder with the clear need to rub his neck in that adorably awkward tic of his- it melted Sebastian's heart. Sebastian cupped Cullen's face between both hands, making sure he met his eyes.

"Tell me, luv. I don wish to force you."

"You wouldn't," Cullen swore, vehemently. "I want this. I just… didn't _expect_ … I've wanted this more than anything for _months_ but until now it was idle fantasy."

"Then do to me what you fantasised about." Sebastian pressed a hard kiss to Cullen's lips. " _Fuck_ me, Cullen."

Cullen almost sobbed at the words, but then they were back to kissing - harder now, more intense and yet more sweet. Cullen's hands were no longer light as butterflies on the Sebastian's robes, but pawing him desperately to find where the cloth parted.

Cullen was dressed only in the light cotton for under his armour, so Sebastian's deft fingers had no trouble undoing all the laces he could find while pushing and pulling at fabric until Cullen was forced to draw back and pull his undershirt over his head while Sebastian could kick his breeches down to his ankles. Cullen didn't move in for another kiss immediately, rather tore at the elusive sash of Sebastian's robes and opening them with over-eager, clumsy hands. Sebastian sat up only to let Cullen pull the clothes remaining on him over his head, leaving him naked under him.

"You're not even wearing smalls?" Cullen choked, and Sebastian couldn't help the small, mischievous grin.

"I needed the cool breeze to get to the Gallows without embarrassing myself, luv."

Cullen made another choked sound - as if he didn't know Sebastian had this side to him that would occasionally come out to tease, and Sebastian used the opportunity to push Cullen's smalls down from his hips as well, eager for them both to be naked now.

"Get us some oil," Sebastian instructed before Cullen could lay down on him again, and Cullen faltered for a moment before clambering off the bed to grab a vial from the cupboard next to his armour stand. He didn't open the vial immediately, just dropped it on the pillow next to Sebastian's head in favour of getting back to kissing first.

Sebastian could feel the nervousness in his lover, even if he was hard as a rock, his erection pressing almost painfully in the soft part of Sebastian's thigh. This really wouldn't do, he needed Cullen relaxed and _happy_.

"Luv, turn over."

Cullen drew back from their kiss to give Sebastian a look of confusion, which the brother used to flip them over on the bed. It took a bit of wriggling to get back to the comfortable middle, the bed too narrow for two people even without rolling about, but neither of them was willing to let that spoil the mood. Sebastian kept his lips to Cullen's as they squirmed together, moving kisses down his jaw and to his chest when their teeth knocked together one too many times. He made his way down with slow, tender kisses and sharp nips of his teeth, giving Cullen's nipples a few moments of extra attention to enjoy the flutter of breath in the chest beneath him and the fast staccato of Cullen's heart against his ribcage.

But Sebastian wouldn't be kept from his purpose for long. It was easy to follow the dusting of blond hair down to the certain and widening trail that lead to the pronounced vee of Cullen's hips. The cock he found there lay heavy and flushed red into the left fold of the vee, damp at the tip and lightly bouncing under the sharp breaths that Cullen was taking in.

This was Sebastian's prize for tonight, and he intended to have it burrowed deep within him before the night was over. For now he could use it to suck out some of that tension in his lover's body.

He dipped a quick kiss to the tip while wrapping his fingers around the base of the shaft, slow but with purpose. He could hear Cullen's breath hitch, but Sebastian wasn't here to hurry. He was here to kiss and then flick his tongue against the tip, tasting the salty precum with a pleased hum. His hand gave a slow pump and Cullen's breath left him in a shuddery moan.

"Relax fer me, luv," Sebastian instructed, and then took the tip into his mouth, sucking Cullen's cock halfway down in one go. Rather than relaxing, Cullen's whole body went taut at the sudden warmth enveloping him, but that shouldn't be a surprise. Sebastian held his hips down with ease, his lips pressed to his own hand around the thick shaft as he suckled on his treat. It was already laying heavy on the back of his tongue like this, and he needed a moment to overcome his gag reflex.

Honestly, he didn't remember having one. Years of chastity in the Chantry must have brought it back, because he used to swallow cocks this size down without hesitation or problem before his parents sent him off to repent.

A deep moan bubbled from Cullen's mouth, and Sebastian echoed it deep in his throat, enjoying the slight, aborted thrusts of Cullen's hips as he felt the vibrations of Sebastian's voice around him. After a few more seconds he started to bob his head, slow at first, his hand moving with strokes in opposite direction so his lips and fingers came together in the middle each time, but soon picking up speed as Cullen's sounds increased in volume.

Sebastian regretfully hushed him as he came up, and Cullen all but stuffed a fist into his mouth to bite down on and keep himself quiet while Sebastian returned to the task at hand.

Cullen was _delicious_. Thick and long and eager, just how Sebastian had liked it before. He hadn't picked Cullen for his physical prowess but the fact that his love matched his tastes so well felt almost like divine providence. Like this was meant to be.

The thought alone had him reach behind him to start awkwardly finger himself open with a single dry finger, too needy to wait. He didn't want to stop to reach for the oil, he just wanted- he just _needed_ -

"Sebastian-" Cullen's breathy voice had Sebastian pull off his cock with a wet pop, meeting the eyes of his flustered lover. "If you keep going, I'll-"

Sebastian smiled, trying not to outright smirk at how fast he got Cullen worked to the edge, and released Cullen's cock entirely in favour of crawling over his lover's body.

"I want you to fuck me, luv," he told Cullen again, enjoying the way Cullen's eyes flicked away for a moment in embarrassment. "Would you prepare me, please?"

Cullen faltered for a moment, clearly unsure what Sebastian was asking, but then it dawned on his face and he grappled blindly for the vial of oil. He was clumsy spreading the oil on his fingers while Sebastian settled with his knees on either side of Cullen's waist, watching him heatedly. But he managed to close the vial again and bring his hand behind Sebastian.

The first brush of the oil slick fingers was hesitant, pulling back again as if the mere skin of Sebastian's crack burned Cullen. Sebastian kissed him tenderly to encourage him, keeping their eyes locked so Cullen could see what he was doing to him.

When the first calloused finger rubbed lightly against the pucker of Sebastian's hole, he felt his own breath flutter and he had to force himself to keep his eyes open. He watched Cullen's pupils dilate at the sight of him and licked his lips purposely, nodding to give his lover the go-ahead.

"Are you _really_ su-"

Sebastian kissed Cullen hard to shut him up, this time with a mildly impatient growl in the back of his throat. "Cullen, I luv you but if ye don put tha' cock in me arse in the next ten minutes, Ah _swear_ to the Maker-"

If anything, Cullen's eyes darkened further with Sebastian's brogue getting thicker, and Sebastian found his lips overtaken by Cullen's at the same time as a thick finger pressing into him. He keened at the sensation, Cullen's finger entering him in an angle he hadn't felt for years, the callouses rough in such different places than his own. If he had been standing his knees would've buckled, but he knew Cullen would've caught him regardless.

"Another one," Sebastian demanded, and Cullen didn't hesitate this time. The second finger was more of a stretch, Cullen's fingers thicker than Sebastian's own, but it didn't hurt much. Sebastian had used toys often enough for this to be _normal_ rather than painful. He rolled his hips back against the two fingers for more until Cullen got the drift, pumping his fingers into Sebastian's hole with obscene little sucking sounds from the oil.

"Oh, Maker," Cullen vowed softly against Sebastian's lips, and Sebastian moaned louder for him in response, pressing their lips together hard in the hope that would muffle the noise for outside the room.

He allowed Cullen to pull back only after several minute, when Cullen clearly wanted to speak. "More?"

Sebastian shook his head quickly. "No. Just you."

Cullen's fingers pushed in deep, his knuckles pressing indents into Sebastian's arse as the fingers twitched inside and drew helpless gasps of need from him. Cullen spread his fingers against the press of Sebastian's insides, much stronger than Sebastian could've anticipated, and a high, long keen escaped him at the same time as Cullen's fingers pulled out.

"Lay down for me?" Cullen asked, sounding almost shy again. Sebastian gave a toothy smile, eager to obey if that was what his lover wanted. It was a bit of a struggle in their hurry to get into position, but Sebastian didn't care for full comfort anymore, just getting on his back as fast as he could and pulling his legs up by the back of his knees.

Cullen slotted himself under Sebastian's legs, allowing them to hook over strong arms for comfort, and Sebastian grappled for the thick cock brushing against his arse.

"Oil," he muttered distractedly, fingers fumbling now in his hurry. He got the vial open and too much of the oil on the palm of his hand. He had no idea if he managed to close the vial properly again but he couldn't care less right now, too consumed by his need to grab Cullen's cock and pump it in his hand to spread the oil. Cullen's moan rumbled over him and Sebastian desperately whimpered.

"Please, Cullen, _please_ -"

It would be a tight fit, and that was how Sebastian preferred it, but Cullen… Cullen was too careful, too gentle for his own good.

Cullen fumbled a bit, pressing forward but not pressing hard enough to push through the resistance of Sebastian's muscles. Sebastian kept Cullen's cock lined up with one hand stubbornly, murmuring encouragements and pleases for Cullen to just fuck him, get inside, but Cullen _didn't_.

" _Cullen_ ," Sebastian insisted, a needy, properly desperate whine now.

"I-I don't want to hurt you- I-"

"I'm not an antique crystal glass!"

The comparison made Cullen snort in surprise, and Sebastian rolled his hips down onto Cullen's cock sharply and with that the tip was in, stealing both their breaths.

"Oh-oh fuck Cullen, my luv- _yes_ _please, more-_ "

Cullen shuddered over him and did not protest. Sebastian had to cover his mouth with a hand to silence his own garbled begging for more as Cullen slowly filled him up, pressing deeper and deeper until Sebastian's eyes rolled back, unable to believe Cullen was really _that_ big. Was Cullen that big? He felt _huge_ inside him, much bigger than Sebastian expected, much more filling and hot and _pressure-_

"How are you so tight?" Cullen whimpered, and Sebastian just clenched his muscles to milk Cullen harder, both of them gasping at the sensation.

"Don't stop," Sebastian begged. Cullen still paused, but only for a second before he started to move once more.

The thick, slow slide of his hard cock was enough to leave Sebastian entirely unable to speak, just moans and whines coming out of him anymore, to be muffled by his hand. Cullen took the encouragement and picked up his pace, still slow but smoother in his movements, pumping in and out of Sebastian's hole.

It was clear Cullen wanted to speak again, but there was only a slightly garbled moan and he went harder, faster, even a little rougher. Sebastian begged with all the coherency he could muster, fingers curling around and digging into Cullen's arse to pull him in for more as if his begging wasn't enough.

When Cullen leaned over far enough Sebastian took his hand from his own mouth to tangle his fingers into blond curls again, dragging Cullen's head down to mash their lips together too hard, a little painfully, but _needy_. They both moaned into the kiss loudly - too loudly, but they were beyond caring. They could regret later.

Right now there was no place for regrets. There was only a place for them breathing the air straight from each other's lungs and Cullen filling Sebastian to the brim with pleasure and heat.

There was only the edge of release creeping up on them as the roll of Cullen's hips smoothed out with practice.

"C-Cullen, my luv, please-" Sebastian pulled on Cullen's arse a little harder, and next thing he had one of those large warrior hands wrapping around his neglected cock. It took two, three, four strokes and Sebastian was biting down hard on his bottom lip to muffle his scream and he came, messy hot cum streaking his own abdomen while Cullen's hand milked him dry.

Cullen whispered - _whimpered_ \- his name reverently and lost his rhythm, lost the smoothness of his thrusts, and muffled his own deep moan in Sebastian's shoulder as he fell over the edge, filling Sebastian with his seed.

Their panting filled both their ears, soft whimpers that could've been either of them barely audible between the sucking in of air. Cullen didn't drop his weight on Sebastian, but he was definitely losing the fight against gravity nonetheless, so Sebastian pushed his legs down for Cullen to release them and tug the larger man on top of him.

"Maker's Breath," Cullen all but wheezed into the nape of Sebastian's neck.

"I luv you," Sebastian told him instead.

Cullen pressed up on his elbows, half his weight still on Sebastian, his cock softening inside of him, and sought out his eyes.

"I love you too, Sebastian. But I never meant to take your vows from you."

"And you didn't," Sebastian reassured him warmly, framing Cullen's face with his hands and smiling up at his lover's flushed, sweaty face. "It was my decision. It was _my_ choice that I wanted _you_ more. Thank you fer giving me what I wanted so bad, my luv."

"I'll give it to you as often as you like," Cullen swore to him quietly, and Sebastian couldn't help himself. He really couldn't, he just _had_ to smirk at that.

"Oh, really? I hope you have the stamina, my luv, because the night is young and my need is great."

Cullen groaned, but laughed all the same.

"I should've known you'd be insatiable. But don't worry, I'm a Templar. I have plenty stamina to wear you out, my love."


End file.
